Tuesday, April 3, 2012

What They See

I've looked into these eyes countless times.
They are perfect. They are innocent. They are hopeful. They are full of pride. They are loving.

These are the eyes of my 3 year old.
I have often asked myself what these eyes see when they look at me.

To these eyes I am the most beautiful woman they have ever seen.
I have magic kisses that heal any "owie" instantly.
I am the best cook in the world.
I have eyes in the back of my head.
I come up with brilliant games to play.
I give the best hugs.
I am their moral compass.
I am the world's best singer.
I am an awesome dancer.
I have a direct line to speak to Jesus.
I smell like roses.
I am a role model.

This is how my children look at me.

I feel an immense amount of pressure to not let them down.

If I complain that I am not beautiful, they will be confused about what beauty is.
If I tell them to "suck it up" when they get hurt, my kisses will not be needed anymore to heal.
If I don't pay attention to what they are doing, they will get into trouble.
If I don't have time to play with them, I will become boring.
If I don't take the time to cuddle with them, my hugs will not be so special.
If I make a have a "bad judgement" moment, they will know that they can too.
If I don't sing and dance with them, singing and dancing will not be as silly.
If I don't pray or read my Bible, they will think they don't need to either.

But I am not perfect, and it is inevitable that I will make mistakes. I will be "too busy" to play with them at times. My kisses will someday lose their healing power. I will say something stupid silly in front of them {"we don't say stupid mommy"}. I will miss a devotional. I will burn dinner. I will have bad breath. I will not have any ideas on a game to play. I will yell at somebody in traffic.

But God's grace can redeem all those things where I will let my kids down. I have learned so much about forgiveness from my own children. When I have lost my temper with them, or when I have been too selfish to play with them, and when I have been broken with them and apologized for letting them down; they forgive me instantly. To them I am still perfect. Even in my failures I am still flawless. I am inspired to be a great mom because of my children.

It makes me wonder how Christ looks at me? Does He see me as perfect?
He knows how I sin. He know where I am weak. And yet, He still loves me.

Ephesians 2:4-5 But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ; by grace you have been saved.

Praise God for His grace and mercy! He forgives my failures, just as my children do. I'm so lucky to be a daughter of Christ and I'm so lucky to be a mother to some very forgiving boys. And I am blessed that to their innocent eyes, I'm still perfect.




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